SEXUAL ATTRACTION AND LOVE:- A DEEP ANALYSIS IS NEEDED TO AVOID MOST OCCURRED CRIMES

DATE:- 13.06.2016

Preface:  

Is Sexual attraction really a Love? 

Can you differentiate between Love and Sexual Attraction along with analysis of both situations? 

It is need of the time. In the teen age, youngsters often attract towards each other. A good looking face, smart guy, costly mobiles, long drive on motorbikes & motorcars, expansive shopping at shopping malls, night club parties,  fashionable apparels etc. are the high expecting dreams of teenagers. These things may attract somebody at the first instance but we did not apply our mind to think what is wrong or right. The basic reason is that we attract towards these material things without making any analysis of this attraction. Even most of the teenagers do not shy to accept sex before marriage. They treat with sex just like as a play without bothering worst consequences. Attraction towards good looking faces, smart way of talking by some body, girls indulge in modern life style is just starting of a blunder mistake which after wards turns your whole life into darkness.

Now-a-days, it becomes a culture that youngsters studying in universities or colleges and adults working in the offices attracts towards somebody having opposite sex of them due to various reasons. They think that they fall in love with that person and their mind stop thinking about all other things but only that person. Mostly person fails to identify that it is not a perfect love and do the common mistake.

Youngsters like to wear fancy clothes and indulge themselves in the life style of fashion to look smart and beautiful. Boys used to purchase expensive and branded clothes to impress to the girls to whom they like. Girls spent more than half a day to wear designer clothes, make-up their faces, designing and shading the hairs, to wear costly jewellery etc. instead of spending their valuable time in other useful activities. I am not straight forward criticizing these things, but I want to say that these activities should be done in a restrictive manner. By this article, I just want to indulge everybody (mainly the youngsters) into the deep study of Love and Sexual attraction, which I think, may help us to control the increasing crime rate in our Country. It is need of the time to think over this issue by the youngsters, who themselves are the main victims of the today’s crimes.

Sexual Appeal & Meaning of Love:

Do you know what Love is? Sexual attraction is not love at all. Love is meant to understand the other, to help the other, to sacrifice everything for somebody else, to lose the game of life for others, to surrender our self physically and psychologically in the custody of another person, to stop using the mind & to start listening to our heart only, to adjust with another, to add somebody into your thoughts, mind and in your whole life. Love is meant that you & your love are one but all things may or may not happen in the case of sexual attraction.  You may attract towards a beautiful looking girl or a smart guy or somebody may attract towards you due to your good features. But this attraction turns into love or not, it cannot be said in plain words at the first instance. Mostly we fail to make a difference between love and sexual attraction, which results into dire consequences. It is not necessary for a boy that he will love to a beautiful girl, a modern girl, a girl influenced by the European culture or girl wearing transparent clothes or short skirts but he may attracts sexually towards her. This is the same case for girls also and it is not necessary that a girl must love to a boy who is smart & young, a boy wearing branded clothes, a boy having expensive motorbike or car but she may also attracts sexually towards his good looking body physique. The philosophy of Love is totally different. Increasing tendency of marriage breakdowns and other related crimes & issues can be controlled by this study. The Society can be saved to be ruin in the colours of marriage breakdowns and other related issues.

The inability of differentiation between Love and Sexual Attraction is affecting the society in many ways. One is more and more people are becoming victims of this disease, second is the purity of Love is lessening day by day. Love cannot be compared by shrink values. The place of theory of Love is very high. You may love to any person i.e. your life partner, your parents, your Childs, your assets & property etc. In case of Love with your life partner, you must be sure that it should be pure love only and not just sexual attraction. Sexual attraction may turns into love but only after passing a long time.   

Love at first Sight: 

Normally it is presumed that we cannot forget our first love, I want to add in these lines that it must be love and love only and not the sexual attraction. Whenever we see a new face and attracts towards him/ her due to his/ her good appearance or good way of talking, we assumes that we fall in love at first sight, but it not so. We attracted towards that person only due to the good looking features or good personality of that person. According to my views, you cannot love a person without understanding him/ her. Until and unless you did not spent some time with other, did not try to understand that other person and did not have any feeling of sacrifice for that other person to whom your heart claims to be your love, love may not happen in actual.

Inability to differentiate Love and sexual attraction: 

There are several reasons, which make us unable to differentiate between love and sexual attraction. One is teenage and second is lack of control on our mind. It is very clear that we are not fully able to take the important decisions of our life at teenage and very often we do the common mistake. We have a little experience of life at our teenage and our mind is not static. We fail to check that what is right or wrong due to immaturity.     

Some Guys, Girls ruin their career due to this immaturity and due to any mistake done in the influence of love, which is sexual attraction only and not love in actual.

Work place environments: 

Sexual attraction is main root cause of sexual harassment at work place also. In today work places, men and women are working together at the same offices and mostly women so working are victims of the sexual harassment at work place. Even some people did not want to understand that “yes means yes” & “no means no” and they engaged to exploit to the women and takes undue benefit of their dominion position. Modesty is the property of the women and no one is allowed to outrage the modesty of any women. The same is punishable also under sec – 354 of IPC.

Social Approach: 

Marriage breakdowns, extra marital affairs, love affairs prior to marriage and sex before marriage, live in relationships etc are some factors which defame our self in the society. There is a steep rise in the cases of mental tension, depression, heart attack, suicides etc due to the above factors. These factors degrade one person or his/ her family in the society.

Rising in marriage breakdown: 

According to the govt. data, divorcee cases/ marriage breakdown cases increased in multiple no’s in last few years. Love marriages are more prone to these accidents. This does not mean that I am against the love marriages, but the decision taken hastily by the youngsters without applying any practical mind results into failure of marriages. Although the situation is more adverse in the arrange marriages. No chance to understand your partner prior to your marriage have many cons. Surrender yourself to a stranger for the whole life may turns your life into worst situations.

Live in relationship & same sex marriage: 

My theory without touching these topics is incomplete. Sometimes I compelled to think that, “whether we are moving in a right direction”? The answer is not so simple and it needs a separate study in detail and covers many aspects of wrong evils of our society. Here I want to make a brief reference to this approach. Live in relationship, same sex marriage, sex before marriages are on high demands by new generations. Youth is agitating on roads to legalize these acts throughout the India. Is it right direction? Is it our culture? Should we move ahead in this direction by labelling this as a modern society or the demand of open mind society? Youngsters want to live in boundaryless society, but by this they are giving birth to many other worst evils in the same society. How can these new issues be settle, it is debateable on the national table.  

Sexual Education: 

It is the need of the time to provide the sexual education along with psychological aspect to the youngsters which makes them enable to differentiate between right or wrong. Sexual education helps to the youngsters to save themselves from serious diseases related to sexual problems, AIDS etc and give awareness on the related issues.

Legal Approach: 

Inability of making differentiation between love and sexual attraction give births to many wrong evils, which results into crimes. Sexual harassment at workplace, acid attack, outraging of modesty, marriage breakdowns, illegitimate Child's and issues related to their legitimacy & their property rights, suicide cases etc are all by-products of this inefficiency or immaturity. If we try to understand this concept and make our society enable to understand this philosophy, then we can curb crimes up to some extent. But there is much need of work to be done in this direction. We should arrange national seminars & group discussions in the Colleges, provide sexual education with psychological aspect to the youngsters, make our laws more stringent to nail these issues. 

These are my personal views and I want national attention on this issue.

Reference:- Lawyers Club Of India

CONSENSUAL RELATIONSHIP ON PROMICE OF MARRIAGE CANNOT BE TERMED AS RAPE

DATE:- 22.04.2016

The Bombay High Court on Thursday, while granting Anticipatory bail to a man,observed that if a major and educated women gets into physical relationship with someone who understands its consequences, then it would not fall under the ambit of Rape. The Charges that accused facing was Sec. 376, 420, 323 and 506 of Indian Penal Code.  

Justice Mridula Bhatkar, observed this while hearing a pre-arrest bail application filed by Solapur resident Sumit Patil (25).  

Patil had filed the Anticipatory bail application through Advocate Priyal Sarda, saying that the relationship between the applicant and the complainant was consensual and a case of Rape is not made out on the other hand, Aniket Nikam on behalf of 24 year old complainant alleged before the court that she leaves in mumbai and the accused stays in solapur and the women got into relationship because he had promised her that he would marry her. He also said that she would not got in to relationship had he not made the false promise of marriage and hence the case of Rape is applicable.

The prosecution’s case is that the accused and the woman met in Solapur in March 2015 and fell in love. The accused promised to marrry her and allegedly forced her to get into a physical relationship and when she conceived, she was made to abort the child and after that the accused refused to marry her and hence she lodged an FIR against him.

The judge, however, clarified that in a similar matter she had taken a view that if an educated woman is mature enough to understand the consequences of having a physical relationship with her partner, then it would not qualify as rape.

The judge said that the victim should have said “No” when she was asked to get into a physical relationship. “I know our society has certain taboos. But if you consider western culture, this is consensual. This is not rape. When the woman is educated and mature she can say no. When you (girl) say yes, it becomes mutual,” observed by Justice Mridula Bhatkar.

The man was further ordered to post a surety of Rs 25,000 and ensure he does not in any way attempt to get in touch with the woman.

CAN WOMEN IS SAID TO COMMIT A RAPE ....????

DATE: 21.03.2016


CAN WOMEN IS SAID TO COMMIT A RAPE....????

The Answer of the question is YES.

A not only Man can commit a Rape but also Women can commit a Rape but can she will be punished for the offence of Rape....???

No. So, Here it comes the fact that i came across while reading... related to the equality... under Article 14 of the Constitution.

I came across this article herein are the facts of the Case:- 

A women is booked for 'raping' son's pal, wherein it is stated that she spiked the minor boy's drink and then raped him (oh! sorry rape is a wrong word here. She forced the minor boy to keep physical relationship, as definition of rape does not include forceful intercourse with male). She also made a video recording of the incident and used to threaten the minor with the video recording who was just 16 years of age. It is also stated that she also threatened the boy with filing of false rape complaint against him.

due to ordeal the boy lost interest in studies and was unable to mix up in the family. His health deteriorated his behavior changed. The news article states that the probe is currently on information of arrest of the accused women is mentioned.

A few questions that come in my mind are:-

1. The identity of the women is not disclosed by media ? If it were a man, his identity including photo would be all over the media.

2. Why there is no information of arrest of women till now ? If this was a man he would have been immediately arrested and people would have been on the streets. He could even have been lynched as happened in the recent past in other parts of India.

This brings us to two conclusions:-

1. We live in the society where male disposibility is the norm. No one is concerned about the ordeal faced by this minor boy in his formative years. The incident is not even termed as rape. It is classified as forced physical relationship thereby undermining it.

2. Why is the perpetrator, who is women in this case, treated with kid gloves and not being subjected to 'EQUAL' treatment. Does Equality only means getting more benefits..?

Let us analysed the Indian Law in this aspect. Forced Sexual intercourse with a minor comes under 2 statutes, 

Indian Penal Code (I.P.C.)

and 

Protection of Children s from Sexual Offences Act. (POCSO).

     

Section 375 of the Indian Penal Code which defined the Rape states:-

A man is said to commit "rape" if he:- 

• Penetrates his penis, to any extent, into the vagina, mouth, urethra or anus of a woman or makes her to do so with him or any other person; or

• Inserts, to any extent, any object or a part of the body, not being the penis, into the vagina, the urethra or anus of a woman or makes her to do so with him or any other person; or

• Manipulates any part of the body of a woman so as to cause penetration into the vagina, urethra, anus or any of body of such woman or makes her to do so with him or any other person; or

• Applies his mouth to the vagina, anus, urethra of a woman or makes her to do so with him or any other person,

• Under the circumstances falling under any of the following seven descriptions: First.—Against her will.
 Secondly.—Without her consent.
 Thirdly.—With her consent, when her consent has been obtained by putting her or any person in whom she is interested, in fear of death or of hurt.
 Fourthly.—With her consent, when the man knows that he is not her husband and that her consent is given because she believes that he is another man to whom she is or believes herself to be lawfully married.
 Fifthly.—With her consent when, at the time of giving such consent, by reason of unsoundness of mind or intoxication or the administration by him personally or through another of any stupefying or unwholesome Substance, she is unable to understand the nature and consequences of that to which she gives consent.
 Sixthly.—With or without her consent, when she is under eighteen years of age.
 Seventhly.—When she is unable to communicate consent.

The starting of the definition is “A man is said to commit “rape” if he”, therefore only a man can commit a rape. A woman cannot commit such an act as per the IPC. Therefore the acts committed, such as above do not find a place here, hence the woman clearly cannot be tried for rape, which is precisely what she did. Therefore this brings us to a point of ‘Equality’; Article 14 of the Constitution states that “The State shall not deny to any person equality before the law or the equal protection of the laws within the territory of India Prohibition of discrimination on grounds of religion, race, caste, sex or place of birth”. Does the minor boy have the same level of protection? Is it equality? Is the law gender neutral? You decide!

Now let us analyse the provisions of POCSO. The statute defines 2 types of sexual assaults on minors: a) Penetrative Sexual Assault, and b) Non Penetrative Sexual Assault. Penetrative Sexual Assault is defined under section 3 of the Act:

 A person is said to commit “penetrative sexual assault” if— (a) he penetrates his penis, to any extent, into the vagina, mouth, urethra or anus of a child or makes the child to do so with him or any other person; or (b) he inserts, to any extent, any object or a part of the body, not being the penis, into the vagina, the urethra or anus of the child or makes the child to do so with him or any other person; or (c) he manipulates any part of the body of the child so as to cause penetration into the vagina, urethra, anus or any part of body of the child or makes the child to do so with him or any other person; or (d) he applies his mouth to the penis, vagina, anus, urethra of the child or makes the child to do so to such person or any other person If we analyse the definition of penetrative sexual assault, it can “ONLY” be committed by a man, a woman cannot commit such an act (every sub-clause starts with a ‘He’). Therefore in this instant case where the minor boy was sexually assaulted by this woman, it is not defined under penetrative sexual assault. Why; again the definition is ‘NOT’ gender neutral and the minor is not ‘EQUALLY’ protected. Then, what crime is said to be committed by this woman? It is ‘non-penetrative sexual assault’. Yes that is correct it is a minor offense. Let us read the definition of sexual assault as per section 7: Whoever, with sexual intent touches the vagina, penis, anus or breast of the child or makes the child touch the vagina, penis, anus or breast of such person or any other person, or does any other act with sexual intent which involves physical contact without penetration is said to commit sexual assault. So in essence, such a gruesome act comes under the definition of non-penetrative sexual assault. Now what is the difference, would be the next question. The difference friends is the punishment. The punishment for penetrative sexual assault is minimum 7 years extendable to imprisonment for life (Section 4). And the punishment for non-penetrative sexual assault is minimum 3 years extendable to 5 years. So in simple terms we draft our laws in a gender biased manner so that criminal women are treated with kid gloves and let off without any repercussions. Further, crimes committed by them are not even defined as crimes (rape by women does not come under the IPC). No wonder serious crimes by women have increased exponentially. The 2000 American Association of University Women (AAUW) data indicate that 57.2 percent of all students report a male offender and 42.4 percent a female offender with the Cameron et al. study reporting nearly identical proportions as the 2000 AAUW data (57 percent male offenders vs. 43 percent female offenders).

If the incidences of female sexual abusers are as high as 63% then why are the rape laws not gender neutral ? Is 'EQUALITY' not a doctrine enshrined by our constitution..?

Let Us all Stand for a Cause.

Published in Others:-

AWARENESS ON WOMEN'S SAFETY AT WORKPLACE (PART VI)

Date:- 08.01.2016

AWARENESS ON WOMEN'S SAFETY AT WORKPLACE (PART VI)

NOTE:- I have prepared this article for public to understand to to make them aware regarding Safety of Women at Workplace through images shown below. This document is prepared in a generic aspect for basic understanding about the law against harassment of women defined under Indian Penal Code  in India through Images. Please consult or take a proper guidance for Right Information.

This is the end of topic on Womens Safety

Thank you.

Now next blog will be on new topic.  Stay tuned....

WOMEN'S SAFETY AT WORKPLACE IS MUST AWARENESS ON SEXUAL HARASSMENT (PART V)

Date:- 02.01.2015

WOMEN'S SAFETY AT WORKPLACE IS MUST AWARENESS ON SEXUAL HARASSMENT (PART V)

NOTE:- I have prepared this article for public to understand to to make them aware for the crime Sexual Harassment at Workplace through images shown below. This document is prepared in a generic aspect for basic understanding about the law against sexual harassment in India through Images. Please consult or take a proper guidance for Right Information.

These are the images above help us to identify the crime based on Harassment against Women at Workplace. 

Stay tuned for last part

LETS TALK ABOUT WOMENS SAFETY THROUGH IMAGES BASED ON SEXUAL HARASSMENT (PART IV)

Date:- 31.12.2015

LETS TALK ABOUT WOMENS SAFETY THROUGH IMAGES BASED ON SEXUAL HARASSMENT (PART IV)

NOTE:- I have prepared this article for public to understand to to make them aware for the crime Sexual Harassment at Workplace and its related laws. This document is prepared in a generic aspect for basic understanding about the law against sexual harassment in India through Images. Please consult or take a proper guidance for Right Information.
______________________________________________________________________________

Please read my Previous Blog on this topic for more Information (i.e. Part I & II)

  

                                                                                                     Reference:- Internet

                                                                                                                              Reference:- Internet

                                                                                                                   Reference:- Internet

                                                                                                                              Reference:- Internet

                                                                    

                                                                                                        Reference:- Internet

                                                                                                 Reference:- Internet

                                                                                                   Reference:- Internet

                                                                                                                       
                                                                                                                              Reference:- Internet

Reference :- Breakthrough

Reference :- Breakthrough

Reference :- Breakthrough

                                                                                                        Reference:- Internet

                                                                                                            Reference:- Internet

                                                                                                                  Reference:- Internet